Resolution Revolution; A Fresh Spin on Self-care

January is the perfect time for shifting focus from holiday hectic to personal well-being. The shorter days of winter naturally leave more time for reflecting and reconnecting with our deepest values.

As if! Not with all the holiday extra we have left to undo. So instead of slowing down, we rachet up our list of things to fix and dive in head first, eventually washing up in a wave of burnout. No wonder we’re so over our resolutions by February.

It’s easy to blame ourselves when new habits don’t stick, as though it’s our lack of self-control or worse, self-esteem that keeps us from choosing habits of health and happiness.

As I recently heard myself say to my coach, if I valued myself more I would charge more money for my work. Using this misguided rationale, if you cared more about yourself, you would prioritize habits of health and happiness. So here it is, more shame language as if belittling ourselves will motivate us.

When has that ever worked? But it’s hard not to fall for this mind trick, even for people who study and write about it!

Although we all know how to make healthy choices, you may not know habits aren’t built upon willpower. Our most common behaviors are more unconscious than not, and since we spend most of our time in our heads, it’s normal to drop back to habit mode before we even realize we did it.

And when stress levels escalate, all bets are off. We can become so desperate for the instant relief our go-to habits provide, our emotional brain hijacks all our rationale. From this triggered state, you’re utterly convinced you have no choice, there’s no other way to satisfy the craving or stop the discomfort, which is true in the short term.

Yet willpower is not how behavior change works. When we understand the psychology, we can see why it’s so hard to slow down in a culture that glorifies busy. Jon Kabat-Zinn, the founder of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, ​describes​ our” always on” state as the feeling that “life is unfolding at a pace that I find unmanageable in my psyche and in my nervous system.”

For many of us, this feeling of overwhelm has become a way of life, and the most common response is to accelerate your pace to keep up, even when it may lead to burnout.

In the month of self-improvement, if mindful self-reflection is the last thing you have time for, instead of pushing harder, why not give your willpower a rest?

Of course, slowing down to breathe, to eat mindfully, to stay present throughout the experience is another way to surf the urge when you catch it in time. But it’s counterintuitive, and when we’re stressed, it’s extremely hard to do.

Here are 3 ways to shift into health and wellness, no self-improvement plan required.

Clear the Mental Clutter

With stimulation coming at us from all angles, we all have too much going on. Yet a cluttered mind makes it hard to stay focused on our priorities.

Letting go of activities that don’t align with your priorities is a great metaphor for clearing the mind. Cleanout queen Marie Kondo suggests asking yourself, “Does it bring me joy?” as a practice of taking inventory to assess whether the things you’re spending time on will help you reach your goals.

Here are the most common mental clutter streams in question:

· Social media

· Celebrity news

· Mainstream media

Does any of this sound familiar? When we take an honest look at how much time we spend on these low-quality distracting activities, we can reorganize our time to clear space for the things that bring us joy, or at least support us in reaching our goals.

Organization matters, both externally and from within. So use the Marie Kondo question as a metaphor for creating an organized mental and emotional environment. It’s the first step to making space for more joy!

Begin your morning with light and gratitude.

Recently I listened to an expert-led summit outlining proven steps to live long and thrive. In fact, that was the name of the event. Of course, sleep topped the list, but as one expert reminds us, the quality of your next night’s sleep begins the moment you wake up.

Begin your day right by stepping outside, or even just peeking your head out the door if the weather is too unfriendly, and filling your eyes with daylight. This works in all cloud conditions since UV beams still seep through, shifting your circadian rhythms as the light hits your retinas.

This 5-minute exercise is a good time to recognize your efforts, in gratitude for yourself and the subtle beauty of nature even the darkest day holds. You’ll be amazed at the impact this simple shift has in shaping the start of your day and the quality of your sleep that night.

More than Just a Drink…

Too often we rush through our morning routine, downing a hot or cold bev as we go, with no attention to the sensory pleasure trove right there in front of us. In our multitask society, we prioritize efficiency at the expense of presence, meaning we miss out on the best part.

Instead, why not make your coffee or tea a sensory highlight, at any time of day? Sit down, sip, savor, and relish the experience. Instead of just a beverage; it’s a​ mindful opportunity​ to engage all your senses in a delightful way.

Most importantly, be nice to yourself. Ultimately we could all use more self-kindness, aka compassion, every time we stumble. Even if it’s daily. Counterintuitive as it sounds, it’s the secret ingredient to lasting well-being.

To your practice,

Elizabeth

As a Wellness and Career Coach with over a decade of experience, I know it takes more than knowing better to rewire old patterns into changes that last.

The good news it’s possible to transform your body, mind, and spirit at any age! ​book a 20 minute discovery session​ to learn whether life coaching can help you reach your goals!